Thursday, January 21, 2010

Still...

sick. But hopeful.
pregnant. And THANKFUL!
in need.

I had a 6 days running, "no throw-up" trend going. Until last night. I always read the Verse of the Day online and ironically, yesterday's verse was James 1:2, the "consider trials pure joy" verse. Out of all of the verses in the Bible, I know that God wanted me to have that one bound around my neck yesterday.

The truth: I'm done with this. I can't take it anymore and I'm ready for life to return to normal. I'm ready to do my housework without wanting to puke. To have enough energy to really play with Henry. Ready to start working out again. To WANT to eat food again. And so much more.

I have such mixed emotions about all of this. I'm tired of being sick, but I know that the reason I'm sick, is because I'm PREGNANT!!!! So many women would kill to be sick if it meant that they were going to have a baby! I know this. I am so thankful that God has given me this blessing - and really just handed it over without much trying on our part. This is a blessing. BUT...

I don't want to be sick anymore. And I know that God can and will heal me. I WILL NOT lose my faith. Job didn't. Man, can you imagine? And now I feel bad for the "BUT.." above.

I'm talking in circles. The point is this: I need prayer. Not only prayer for healing, but for perserverance and for joy in suffering.

P.S. If you've seen the TBS commercial for Family Guy where Stewie says "Mommy, Mom, Ma, etc" then you'll find this funny. Travis has taught Henry that whole skit and he does it several times a day. So cute...and a bit tiring.

Monday, January 4, 2010

Not my brother, not my sister, but it's me, Oh Lord...

Standing in the need of prayer.

Oh man...the last three weeks have been a struggle, to say the least. But it all culminated this morning into a huge mess. Henry woke us up at 5:30 - Travis goes in there to give him his water and lay him back down in hopes of getting another 30 minutes of sleep. HA! As soon as he enters the room, he runs back out and asks me if I have a strong digestive system this morning. I think, "oh gosh, why is he asking me this?" Then the smell wafts through the air. Vomit.

I'll spare all of the details, but they include a couple more times of throwing up, some "death" poops, and three baths!!! Ah the joys of being a mother! I do have to commend Travis for cleaning up the vast majority of the mess - he has been such a great helpmate to me in these last 3 weeks.

And speaking of the last three weeks, well I just want to block them out. As you all know from our brilliant shirt idea, we are pregnant (well mostly me). I have had some pretty horrible ALL DAY sickness that I can't seem to shake. I was sick with Henry but not to this degree (girl??). My weight has plummeted to an all-time low, due to the excessive nausea and vomiting. My midwife prescribed me Zofran - that didn't touch this stuff. Basically, I'm pretty miserable to be around.

So where do you turn when things are down? GOD!! Let me tell you - I've kept in constant communication with Him these past weeks. At first, I was praying for complete healing - a miracle of sorts. Nothing happened. I start feeling doubtful and hopeless. Poor poor me. Then a revelation. I need to be praising God for this miracle, praising Him for this time of suffering because of what it will bring. James 1:2 says "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance mush finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."

WOW! Talk about an attitude change - a HARD one at that! Morning sickness is pure joy?!? YES - because it's making me stronger and more complete. Just the type of mother I want to be to this new life.

Please keep us in your prayers. I'll keep you and yours in mine!